There is a good friend of mine… I have to pause here. I don’t know how good a friend he is when I call him and he doesn’t return my calls. I asked him about it and he gave me this explanation that compels me to feel sorry for him: he is so busy, work is cutting his pay and increasing his workload,  it takes all of his emotional reserves to deal with people at work, and when he is home, he wants to tune everything out. As if this type of thing is unique to him. Another good friend of mine works with special ed students, especially autistic and other special needs students. As an educator who works with kids who constantly need his attention, he is drained. All my dealings with students at any level has also placed emotional demands on me. This so-called good friend of mine… he is not special. He is lucky enough to have a full-time job, even if things are fucked-up right now.

Now that I’ve talked smack about why he doesn’t call me back, here’s some more smack: he calls me up asking me “for a favor” because he’s going on vacation. When I listen to the voicemail, I wonder what it is. I call back this time and he actually answers the phone. We chat and the favor turns out to if I could record some shows. Unfortunately, I tell him, I do not have a DVR and that’s the truth. I catch up with most of my TV viewing through the on-demand channels or Hulu.

I suspect the TV show in question is Project Runway. As much as I enjoy the show, I just don’t consider it a life-or-death situation. Some time ago, when I was blogging recaps, I did. But my summer viewing has been about Dr. Who, True Blood, Being Human, and Mad Men, in that order.

Ignore me, call me when you’re drunk, and call me when you want to watch TV. And if I piss you off, what are you going to do? Not talk to me? Geez!

Somehow, we will wind up having a lunch where my friend will get mushy and say we should hang out more often. As long as there isn’t excess alcohol involved, it’s ok.

This week, the designers got to make paper dresses. While it’s not the first time  for this type of challenge (the recycled plastic and paper challenge, the Hershey’s dresses), it is the first one solely devoted to paper and a shameless plug for the LA Times. Even with them, the NY Times, BBC News, and every small newspaper outlet going online, the LA Times seems hell bent on preserving their paper edition. This, of course, means ink-smudgey fingers while going through the Style guide. Oh, let’s not forget that the designers must also have inky hands by the end of this challenge.

Shirin, who’s normally one of the more innovative designers, came up with a style of skirt we saw on the 5th season of Project Runway and the more recent PR knockoff The Fashion Show. Still, it’s Bjork-worthy along with the time consuming “feather” skirt made by Christopher.

With this season, there now seems to be a thread of lameness with some losing designers. First, Mitchell goes home for doing nothing while his partner does all the work and wins. This week, Johnny comes up with the lousiest excuse ever for having to make another dress when the first one wasn’t working. It was DAMAGED by the STEAM and WATER sputtering from the IRON? He wasn’t willing to own up to the fact that he panicked after Tim Gunn tore apart his origami motif dress. Living up to an addict stereotype, he came up with an alibi which only made him look worse in front of the teammate and the judges. His model became his enabler as she bought the story and then backed him up in front of the judges. She gets points for being loyal, but she should have seen through that. Nicholas, who had punk rock fail when it came to vision, called him out in front of the judges.

Althea, Ra’mon, and Gordana definitely made dresses that didn’t look like newspapers at all, though Althea had the more striking design. Either one should have won instead of Irina. Irinia did some arresting work with the faux-faux fur touch on the trenchcoat and it was 1950′s couture lovely. I didn’t care for the seam that was drawn on the back vent with a pen. It won because the Desperate Housewife wants to wear it.

Speaking of which, is it just me or is there an actress featured as a guest judge for the episiodes. There’s also more industry people showing up as guest judges as well, but can’t PR go actress-lite? Perhaps these women are essentially audience surrogates – their opinions and point of views may be closer to the Lifetime viewer than those of Tim Gunn and the regular judges. This Project Runway definitely feels different than it’s Bravo incarnaton.

Coming up with fashions for surf divas – kind of expected considering Project Runway has relocated to Southern California. The twist – these designers have to work in teams, which is always a recipe for drama and ultimately disaster. Mitchell definitely courts it by appointing Ra’mon to be his teammate, expecting Ra’mon to carry him through the challenge. Qristal and Epperson – the bad marriage as Epperson channels Santino without any of the flair in design or personality. These two pairing are a definite trainwreck.

Mitchell, who just got by last week by dumb luck hopes to replicate his success by appointing a strong teammate. Ra’mon is definitely the key figure in them winning the challenge, but he also turns out to be instrumental in Mitchell no longer being able to cheat fate. The judges, especially Heidi Klum, are dismayed that Mitchell contributed very little to the dresses, a lovely, multi-colored number and an adapted yellow neoprene dress, which was very risky. Ra’mon is declared the winner, but Mitchell goes home, which should have been a week earlier. His little joke about “Auf wiedersehen, bitches” proves to be a little too prophetic for him. This odd winner-loser pair is the first ever.

Some pairings go well, such as Nicholas and Gordana, even though there’s a strange not-quite-slutty anime princess factor to one of their looks. Also, they threaten to bring back macrame from 30+ years of dormancy.

Johnny and Irina did some nice work together and no drama, especially with Johnny this time. They also threaten to bring macrame out of its dormancy.

Logan has a look topped off with a wide hat while Christopher makes a big, poofy skirt. Innovative collaboration though not my favorite.

Louise and Althea use some retro elements, evoking flapper and Victorian both without rigidly conforming to the eras.

Shirin and Carol create a floor-length wrap to replace the sarong, and the bikini top is even an integral part of the dress, which is brilliant. The other dress is pretty and wearable, but the multi-functionality of the first one, a signature element of Shirin’s design, stands out.

As revealed on Models of the Runway, Mitchell’s model Fatma avoids his fate, even though she showed really bad form by openly displaying anger for him picking her. But for how long?

Catch up with last Thursday’s episode:
http://www.mylifetime.com/on-tv/shows/project-runway/full-episodes/video

Big bummer this week – gender-fuck designer Malvin loses out with a risky design. Of course, the mother hen motif explained doesn’t go over well with the panel. Unfortunately, hack designer/love child of Perez Hilton and John Mayer, AKA Mitchell stays, even though his outfit execution is atrocious.

WTF – Ra’mon looks to his bowling bag for inspiration. That and the stripey dresses the Supremes would wear, with disastrous results. Also, he has boob issues.

Althea definitely has boob issues with her dress, though her dress is more flattering than Ra’mon’s.

Shirin definitely creates a lovely dress which all of the judges want to wear (thus wins), though Louise definitely has a better design instinct, as she anticipates the various stages of pregnancy.

Next week, Project Runway goes where no episode has gone before – the beach, which promises some hot mess drama.

Catch up with the second Project Runway episode “We Want Fashion.”

Just to keep everyone fixated on Lifetime TV for Thursday evening, there were not just one, but three programs. The pre-premiere show was a gathering of the Project Runway All-Stars, which must have taken some with Lifetime’s legal department, but there were the alumni who were available and/or willing/contractually obligated to follow Project Runway on whatever network it airs on. As Chris pointed out, Santino and Jeff Sibelia didn’t change much, especially when it came to obnoxious behavior. The funny thing is when contestants turn out to be odd fashion victims themselves, such as Michael Night’s blue polo shirt for a day, which made him look like he worked at Best Buy. Then what could have been a beautifully female version of the bromance went very badly quickly as Uli and Sweet P making some very same choices with Sweet P prevailing, almost. Daniel Vosovic, however, came out on top with a mini-line that evoked C+C Music Factory’s “Everybody Dance Now!” Are the early 90′s upon us, retro fashion-wise?

The after show fixated on the models whose job is to make the designers outfits look good. Yawn, been there, done that, with watching more seasons of America’s Next Top Model than I’d like to admit.

The main offering, however, is what we’ve all been waiting for—an actual episode of Project Runway. I’ve followed Bravo’s slapped-together replacement, The Fashion Show, but it’s no real substitute. While Isaac Mizrahi can hold his own next to Tim Gunn and his commentary is a hundred times better than Michael Kors, Kelly Rowland doesn’t quite fill Heidi Klum’s shoes. A celebrity fashionista vs. a supermodel who’s walked outfits by some of the most influential designers—supermodel any day. Heidi Klum and Tim Gunn back together, magic.

With so many seasons done in New York City, a change of venue definitely adds some freshness with the show moved to Los Angeles and the design studio set up in FIDM, which is in the heart of the Garment District. With that, comes a whole new cast of hungry designers who have had to keep mum for an entire year while production was going on. How they kept Fashion Week under wraps eludes me. Others who wish to keep spoilers to a minimum could definitely learn some things from the Project Runway team.

Right now, the group is too numerous to list, but some stood out too me. First, there was Ari, whom I’ll christen Bjork Lady II. From her own bright and colorful approach to her personal style, to her philosophies about her designs, to the odd executions of her garment, she has some oddness that would have been fun had she not been voted out. Her getting leaving saved Mitchell, who looks like the lovechild of Perez Hilton and John Mayer, and whose sheer Victorian nightgown barely covers his model. Malvin Vien has some androgynous appeal and he definitely tries to be an equal opportunity designer because no one should be excluded with his clothing. I like him and his Annabella-esque Bow Wow Wow hair. Project Runway can definitely use a little gender fuck to shake up the mostly female-centric challenges (and even the occasional menswear challenge). Johnny promises to provide some drama with his addiction issues (with which he seems to have made some headway but the show threatens to undermine), and no Project Runway is complete without a designer without formal education, as Christopher manages to shine with his unconventional dress. Qrystal goes for overkill with the colorful pattern, which must have looked great in the fabric shop, but now overwhelms her dress. She should have something fabulous soon.

The first celebrity judge was a very sober Lindsay Lohan, who seem to be on a re-branding mission of her own. Given the wild antics of 2007 and even 2008, Lohan offers some constructive comments to the designers. Hopefully, there will be more iconic judges to come. Given that Season 6 is already finished production-wise, but I hope Alec Wek or someone else just as noteworthy shows up.

So here’s to an excuse for staying home on Thursday nights. For a while, anyway.

The cast of hopeful designers, perhaps some who didn’t get picked on the previous seasons of PR, also provide no shortage of drama. Infighting starts early on, especially when the flamboyant Merlin gets into an argument with Daniella, culminating in Merlin stating “It’s male domination, girl!” and Daniella retorting, “Male? Where?” As for insecurity, Isaac Mizrahi’s comment to one designer (who barely escapes being eliminated in the first episode) causes her to quit at the beginning of the second episode.

The comments from the judging panel ranges from high praise to over the top ridicule. As I mentioned earlier, Mizrahi’s comments can be very cutting. Kelly Rowland will also bring up the meanest comment an audience member says about the worst designer’s garment, which saves her from saying something she doesn’t know anything about. Given that there are two major fashion schools in NYC, I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt get her a crash course in the language these designers speak. There are also a few catch phrases used towards the end of the episodes, but not with the same charm as Project Runway’s. “Goodbye darling” isn’t as warm as “Auf wiedersehen” and “You’re hanging on a thread” is more than tired.

I’m watching, but I’m definitely awaiting the long-delayed start of Project Runway on that other channel.

Read with caution. You don’t want your boss to peek over your shoulder and see you looking at this.

First, I posted some things on Twitter, which found their way onto Facebook as my statuses:

• I had this weird dream I was a student in a class with Tim Gunn and he took off all his clothes while he was teaching.
• Now I know I’ve watched too much Project Runway. Strange thing in the dream was that no one was phased by his disrobing.

Then, I saw Danny’s Facebook status. I commented, and here is the banter that followed:

Danny is still creeped out from his ‘invasion of the body snatchers’-like nightmare but is amused by the idea of dreaming it in an xxx-rated version the next time ;-}. 7:52am

shindo: Invasion of the Body Snatches has a nice porn ring to it. There’s also some fetish-y thing to it. Someone has to have their body snatched and someone wants to do the snatching. Maybe I’m thinking too much in dom/sub terms.

Hopefully, this wasn’t too traumatic to read.

Of course, the shutterbug clichés meets another one: bait and switch. Whenever Heidi Klum greets the designers with that clipped but chirpy hello, we know something is up. So do the designers, and the silence really is golden (pardon the cliché).

This week’s bait and switch – a night out on the town turns out to be too literal. No going out, no needed stress relief by dancing one’s ass off; just roaming around four key points in New York City taking pictures of the lights. They all seem to take it very well in their ponchos and rainboots. Perhaps they were compensated with a bottomless supply of cocktails after they returned to their suites.

Blayne, AKA Tweaker Beck, takes a beautiful picture of the light, but his dress becomes a walking Gay Pride flag on his model.

For some odd reason, Leanne reminds me of Cassandra, long haired girl who wore sundresses and Doc Martens, on Beavis and Butthead. Her slow, thoughtful way of speaking and even her odd inflection were a little too dead on. Unfortunately, I remember that more than her dress. Not good.

While I don’t care about Keith being ultra pushy during the snap shoot, I thought his dress was conceptually brilliant. It looked great on TV, but it must have sloppy close up. Or, Nina was reaching for a comment.

Emily of the Sarah and Tegan haircut goes. The ruffle is just wrong and now that’s a cliché.

This is where some will ask me to turn in my gay card: Sandra Bernhard as guest judge? Seriously?

Ugh, this season seems like it’s going to be full of celebrities trying to establish their fashionista cred. The only one who really has it so far is Natalie Portman.

Right now, I’m inclined to think Suede, the guy with the blue mohawk, is the spiritual son of the Björk Lady. Talking about yourself in the third person is a little too Björk Lady, even for the Björk Lady. There’s probably a bit of Chris March in him as well (remember the big guy who talked to his garments?). For all I know, Suede probably put a spit mark on his fabric, but he seemed to have talked strips of organic silk into a winning number.

I like to think of Korto as the saner counterpoint to Season 2′s Zulema, but there’s a little bit of an echo of the “clothes off your back” as she makes a dress a little too short in the back. Luckily, it’s not butt-less.

Biker Chick/Betty Paige on crack comes back from last week as she puts a very LA kind of rock and roll chic into a one sleeve white satin number (with lace ups). Nice recovery from the trash bag from last week.

As for the brown fabrics, the and the designers are ephemeral. No wonder the guy who does a brown dress gets canned.

As for Tweaker Beck, he’s much more memorable when he makes fun of the Biker Chick. I can’t even remember what he does.

I guess that’s what happens when you go to Comic-Con and delay the posting, My memory seems to gone right now.

Then comes Eureka close to the end of the month.

Oh, and I promise to not post spoilers fresh after viewing the episodes of both shows.