irony


24
Jun 09

Let’s Get Retarded!

Perez Hilton writes catty little posts about celebs and vandalizes their photos with mean little jokes. This, of course, has pissed them off over the past several years of his blogging, bad hair, and weight fluctuations. Unfortunately, he called Will.I.Am a faggot (publicly, not in writing), which was incredibly stupid, resulting in him getting punched out. Then came the glee fests on Twitter and celebrity backlash towards him. I guess it boils down to how whether people like the victim or not. That I find appalling, because if no one likes you, apparently you deserve it. You are seriously fucked.

Oh, he had it coming. How original. Can you say clichĂ©? It still doesn’t make the assault right.


1
Jul 08

Stuff White People Like – You know you want a copy!

I plan to get get my copy of Stuff White People Like this morning when I get the chance to go to a bookstore. I could have ordered in advance some time ago on some website, but I’m kinda tired of the online thing right now. Actually, I’m more tired of checking my mailbox everyday for my orders, only to have my hopes dashed.

The white thing to do is to try to buy it from an indie bookstore. Better yet, if I were in Portland, Oregon, buy it from Powells. By doing this, I establish my indie cred and I accomplish it in a city white people are so fond of.

Actually, I will most likely buy the book from some evil corporate bookstore such as Borders. How uncool is that?

For you Washingtonians: Christian Lander, author and blogger of Stuff White People Like, will appear at Politics and Prose Bookstore and Coffeehouse on July 23, 2008, at 7pm. Punctuality counts.


9
Nov 07

Don’t Go to College

Scott asked me if I had any words of wisdom to offer on my birthday and here’s my response. Jaylen delivers the punchline.

I think I have said something like this before.


31
Jul 07

Open Letter to an Ex-Boss

In publicly bringing closure to this whole bad job issue from last year, I post this open letter to the lovely woman who was my boss for six months.

—— ———
The Company
K&OM Ith Avenue
Ste. LMM
San Diego, CA 92JML

Dear Ms. ———,
Towards the end of my exit interview back in January, you expressed that you hoped I wouldn’t feel any bitterness towards the Company. I must say, though, that I have nothing but good feelings and joyful thoughts towards you and the Company that you represent. My experience with the Company has been one of the most positive in my working life.

First of all, I must commend you on your ability to spend the Company’s money. Some of your choices may be extravagant, but it’s definitely for the long term good. When we moved into our new office, state of the art appliances were installed. The refrigerator and the dishwasher did not match, so in your infinite wisdom, you had a perfectly good (and brand new) dishwasher yanked out and brought in another. You showed you can accessorize for the good of the shareholders and that you can prevail over the accountant, the ultimate corporate spoilsport.

I shall always remember your dazzling interpersonal skills. There are the times where you calmly instructed me on how I should do my job. You always had something very kind to say at the proverbial drop of a hat. I will always look back upon you as someone who treated me with a great deal of humanity. One of my most indelible encounters with you was an open door meeting when you exuberantly praised me in your office for a job well done so everyone can hear. Your smile was memorable as it demonstrated to me that the Company under your leadership was a happy and safe place to work. It also showed me your friendliness and how much you really liked me.

Thank you for the invaluable experience of working for the Company. I shall recommend it as a wonderful place with plenty of growth potential, especially under your guidance.

With very warm regards,

Shinichi Evans