In my last post, I discussed the first half of the “limbo year,” ending with Professor K showing signs of possessiveness towards me.
I would decide not to take Tatiyana’s class, much to my regret, because it was her final semester at the University. A premature departure, I heard through some sources that she was forced to leave because she became involved with her thesis student. The evidence was difficult to conceal since it was growing in her belly. It never bothered me because it was a consensual relationship. She didn’t force some poor kid to take his pants off and rape him – the student was an intelligent and capable man in his late twenties. Joe, on the other hand, dated a woman after she took his class and she lived with him while earning her BA and MA at the University. This too was consensual and Joe never got in any kind of trouble for it. Joe was tenured, but Tatiyana was not. Gender very well could be an issue as well, since a woman is more likely to be punished for a sexual transgression than a man. Despite this, Tatiyana was allowed to be on the MFA admissions committee during her “lame duck” semester.
Since I was acquainted with Tatiyana from a couple of reading events, she gave me the news concerning my application when I saw her on the campus early in the spring semester. Joe had already told me that I was accepted, but Tatiyana was very pleased to give me the news, telling me I deserved it. Joe would later tell me that the committee was uninamous when it came to my application – he, Tatiyana, and Professor Beltran were in agreement. I found Tatiyana’s news delivery, and later Joe’s anecdote, to be assuring because Joe did not have to bully the rest of the committee or politic with one member or the other to get me admitted.
While Joe would vigorously deny this, he likes it when students are in his orbit. Take classes with him, be involved with his projects, party with him – what a student needs out of this gets lost or becomes irrelevant. I never sensed that a student’s growth as a writer or reader was important to Joe. Some of his favorite students were exceptionally literate, while most of them hardly read at all and thought his writing was utterly amazing. Granted, he is better than the average open-miker (and even some of his charges), but he doesn’t hold up to Literature. He’s good at talking as if his work does. Even though I was never a fan of his work, I had a symbiotic relationship with Joe. I took his workshops and worked for him while he was my ally in the English department. I let him cheat me out of studying with Tatiyana because I followed his cue too well. During my first year in the program, Professor Beltran taught a class on William Blake, one of my literary heroes. I mentioned to Joe that I was interested in taking the course, and Joe spoke in a roundabout manner how Beltran could not effectively teach Blake. I listened to him.
To be continued…
Tags: creative non-fiction, graduate school, If You Want To Go To Grad School
